Next part of my troubled relationship posts. Yes it's not the best read in spring since it's depressing but to highten your spirits, check out my food photo.
After my joyful morning sms with 'What a nice weather we're having today, finally snow's starting to melt!' he answered his mood was far from perfect, he felt confused, scared to take the step he should.
Oh not this shit again, I thought, and replied, 'Let's f*cking sort it out, you don't want me in your life, so what, ditch me, I'm no monster to torture you or make you stop, don't make me feel like one.' There followed no sms and heck I want to settle it! He just seriously pisses me off with his indecisiveness. Speaking of the weekend, as expected he didn't want to meet with me. On Saturday he said he would be settling matters wrt his car so he'd be busy and would drop in in the evening. Ok, fine, on Saturday I stay alone at home, lonely, bored, when he texts he's gonna be really late as he hasn't finished with the car yet. Ok again, I understand, during the call I learn he doesn't know when he's going to return home so I tell him to be done with the matters first as I know how important they are. Oh foolish me!
In the afternoon I suddenly decide to go check out his blog, and voila, he's online! Settling it with his car my as*! haha what an a*shole indeed! f*cking liar, lying f*cktard! LOL
I guess parents' present is going to stay home and not be handed to R. because he is in no mood for calling at my place. Oh! and my hopes for eating out at a jap cafe got busted. Damn.
Not only this, he doesn't ask how I'm doing, my health, work, mood, news - he doesn't want to know anything about me. And then, as usual, I give a call, he picks up and the talk ends with an offence. Say, when I told him I didn't believe that he still wanted me the answer was 'It's your problem'. I had a billion things on my mind to retaliate with in an sms but replied nothing.
I cry. I smile. Why? Because I see what a nuisance, a bother I've become for him, and that he doesn't want me in his life. Yet... I'm not over yet, revenge is a sweet thing, and until I'm fully satisfied I'm not gonna let this dumba*s be.
Of course I feel ruined and unhappy but I still hope this spring will bring me a new love. I so want it!
Ok, I've been to this place called 'end of relationship'. It's funny and bitter at the same time, realizing all these weheartit pics were so-so right stating 'You made me believe you'd never leave', 'You said we'd be together forever' etc etc Also, it's unbelievable. Honestly, I can't believe you've been growing the seeds and the moment they broke through the soil you trampled them with own feet. Life oh life, you're ridiculous.
That's why...
I'm getting ready for an official end. And
haha this is creative ! LOL
Troubled relationship
His weird behavior has finally revealed its cause. I've been wrong in my previous post.After my joyful morning sms with 'What a nice weather we're having today, finally snow's starting to melt!' he answered his mood was far from perfect, he felt confused, scared to take the step he should.
Oh not this shit again, I thought, and replied, 'Let's f*cking sort it out, you don't want me in your life, so what, ditch me, I'm no monster to torture you or make you stop, don't make me feel like one.' There followed no sms and heck I want to settle it! He just seriously pisses me off with his indecisiveness. Speaking of the weekend, as expected he didn't want to meet with me. On Saturday he said he would be settling matters wrt his car so he'd be busy and would drop in in the evening. Ok, fine, on Saturday I stay alone at home, lonely, bored, when he texts he's gonna be really late as he hasn't finished with the car yet. Ok again, I understand, during the call I learn he doesn't know when he's going to return home so I tell him to be done with the matters first as I know how important they are. Oh foolish me!
In the afternoon I suddenly decide to go check out his blog, and voila, he's online! Settling it with his car my as*! haha what an a*shole indeed! f*cking liar, lying f*cktard! LOL
I guess parents' present is going to stay home and not be handed to R. because he is in no mood for calling at my place. Oh! and my hopes for eating out at a jap cafe got busted. Damn.
Not only this, he doesn't ask how I'm doing, my health, work, mood, news - he doesn't want to know anything about me. And then, as usual, I give a call, he picks up and the talk ends with an offence. Say, when I told him I didn't believe that he still wanted me the answer was 'It's your problem'. I had a billion things on my mind to retaliate with in an sms but replied nothing.
I cry. I smile. Why? Because I see what a nuisance, a bother I've become for him, and that he doesn't want me in his life. Yet... I'm not over yet, revenge is a sweet thing, and until I'm fully satisfied I'm not gonna let this dumba*s be.
Of course I feel ruined and unhappy but I still hope this spring will bring me a new love. I so want it!
That's why...
Also, my period isn't coming. Last month I had a delay which undermined its perfect course, and this month I don't know when to wait for it, if at all. You see, since R. came inside me at the beginning of March it makes things a bit tangled. I bought a test which shows one stripe, luckily, and I myself am sure there's no baby inside me but still I'm very worried wrt irregular period. Moreover, my stomach hurts and I even had to skip swimming, sadly. F*ck, as if relationship prob were not enough! Heck, what if it doesn't begin this month? I feel it should start because the ache is dull and nagging like during period. I keep my fingers crossed it comes one of these days. S/o knows, told him about the test and absense of menses.
I'll keep you updated on the stuff.
Food photo
This is something to keep you inspired throughout the weekend! ;)
About the Author
I'd rather be thin and dorky than fat and cool
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