Day 136 - been really feeling down lately. Like back in November when I hit a 50kg plateau, it was the worst; it's a bit better now but if I don't change something I know I may hit the dead-point again. Come on, I repeat, it's less than 5 kilos! It's such a nuisance, such a trifle hindrance so easy to overcome - just move, move more, that's the key! Yet, this is exactly the key I lack. I've been off swimming for nearly 3 weeks and I know how badly it's told on my shape and overall body/mind state. I feel awful, but you're aware of it since I don't stop reminding you. Ok. Not only lack of activity is the problem, I have also lost a big motivation; what used to be my main stimulus now has zero effect - my date has sort of disappeared and we don't seem to meet as often as we used to, which is a great drawback. We would go for walks, stay outside, talk, just as simple as be in the fresh air, and now that he's 'up to ears in work' (what a lame excuse) there is no one I can do these things with. It's a sad fact. So here's how my major push has left me. Sure I have other people to spend time with, but it makes me yet sadder that they find more free time for me than someone so dear. Seriously, when you feel close ones distancing away, it can't but disappoint you and reflect on the emotional state. I'm depressed these days. And damn, winter only makes the situation worse.
About the Author
I'd rather be thin and dorky than fat and cool
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