Effects of swimming and my knees' pain, and my troubled relationship whatever-part in today's post.
Today, luckily, is better than yesterday when I was moody and absence of work made the situation yet worse. Fortunately, some new tasks today. I am in search for fresh emotions but keep making one and the same mistake. Every morning I text my acquaintance wishing to spend with him some time after work but by the end of the day I decline own invitation as I feel a sort of aversion to him. All he's gonna ask is about my job and career and we never talk about anything else when we meet, so apparently an hour walk with him is gonna be too much for me. On the other hand, I have no one else to speak with, no friend to talk to ;( So I'm dubious as to if I should contact him or remain lonely forever. Forever alone... yeah.. Damn. Lack of communication is ruinous for me.
Anyways, on to the main topic of the effects of swimming and my knees' pain. If you think here I'm going to speak solely of the good results of swimming you are wrong. Vice versa, today I want to tell you about what negative effects you can get from swimming. Just so you know, for 2 months I've been suffering from intense pain in my knees, not knowing what's the reason for it, I blamed it on the weather, then on squats I do, until finally it dawned on me that the cause hides in my main type of activity. Yes, swimming. I wrecked my brain wondering how come, does sport do me bad? Well, as it turned out, yes. For these past 2 months I've been swimming 4 times a week and breastroking hard - here is what you shouldn't do. I regret I haven't learnt this info earlier because the other day every article I read stated that such a strain in your knees is very unhealthy. The kick you perform with the help of your knees during breastroke affects your ligaments which begin to hurt, and the pain continues until you give it a rest. I've been neglecting said rest, training as hard as I could. My mistake. As a result, unceasing ache while swimming, when sitting, during walking even, which only grew worse! Thankfully, the artciles opened my eyes on the problem, now I practice 4 times a week but don't breastroke, preferring freestyle. It's tough but don't expect me to quit, no f*cking way! ;)
Why have I been this silly all this while? The pro swimmers in the pool barely breastroke so I should've been smarter learning on their example. All they do is butterfly and crawl, so I better practice these styles instead of the ruinous breastroke I've taken to.
If you recall TG (we still communicate) he is still interested except that I am not interested in his suggestions. I'm not in the mood for threesomes with strangers although I tend to be quite desperate in spring and would so so like to try it out. Further, I miss his tool, you know... I miss any tool, hard and potent, however cheesy it might sound to you.
As for R., nothing's been said on his part about if we'd go on that trip I offered, or not. Nothing seems to work. My sms left unanswered and his promises about walks broken. I predict no call from him on Friday-Saturday. I'm not gonna be the first, tired as I am. If he does though, let it be no more than an innocent walk and tea in the kitchen. An upsetting thing happened btw us the other day - I dug an ex gf's number on his contacts' list, even though he's been saying he doesn't have ex's numbers or contact them in any way. When I asked, he said, 'This is the exception. The exception from the rule proves the rule.' Ooh la la, how we talk! Fine, if so, I came up with a revenge - I texted him I too have a certain 'exception' Iam faithful, that's the rule, but every second week I cheat, and this is the exception that proves the rule. The reply from him arrived in a flash - 'We're done.' Mwahaha!!! He doesn't text me goodnight, doesn't have time to sms me at work, but here he answered immediately, isn't this funny? lol
Our 'relationship' is not the partnership it should be, it is rather a fakelationship where each suffers. I want that trip, I want the shoes he promised to buy and at the same time I want to quit. Good guys where are you to help me out? ;(
The 'Happy Notebook' (I don't remember if I told you about this notebook or not. In short, I bought it to denote my to-be happy mutual life with R. planning to start filling it in as we move to our own apartment) is not destined to become the joyful copybook it was supposed to become. Further and further it's getting filled with sad, angry, negative notes that shouldn't be there. I try to write in it as seldom as possible because whenever I decide to, my thoughts are bad, so the pages are full of depression, unhappiness, tears, sometimes pain. I still have half of it blank and therefore, cherish a hope that one day the second half is going to get sunny, cosy records of my renewed life.
Call me dumb but I don't want to fully give up the idea that it's all over with R., call me fool yet deep down I have a grain of belief the fresh start in Spain with him is going to bring us peace... Goddamn, who am I kidding? Deniaaaal here.
But again, read my next post where I'll explain why I want to move to another place and have R. as my hubby and become the 'perfect tumblr girl' or 'tumblr perfect' as they put it ;)
Effects of swimming, knees' pain
Surprisingly enough, today I swam without a second thought. 'Surprisingly' is because as a rule I think of many different things that shouldn't be in my head and hinder me from a thorough workout. Oftentimes, it's R., and how I'm upset about another argument, or how strongly I hate him, or this negative emotion, or that sad convo. So imagine this situation when instead of thinking positive hate is eating me, it's always here. Before, when we started dating, I practiced hard and with zeal and motivation while now it's only me, myself and I in the pool. I walk and swim for myself only. Yes it sucks, more so 'cuz it's spring and I should feel loved and inspired... I permanently suck.Today, luckily, is better than yesterday when I was moody and absence of work made the situation yet worse. Fortunately, some new tasks today. I am in search for fresh emotions but keep making one and the same mistake. Every morning I text my acquaintance wishing to spend with him some time after work but by the end of the day I decline own invitation as I feel a sort of aversion to him. All he's gonna ask is about my job and career and we never talk about anything else when we meet, so apparently an hour walk with him is gonna be too much for me. On the other hand, I have no one else to speak with, no friend to talk to ;( So I'm dubious as to if I should contact him or remain lonely forever. Forever alone... yeah.. Damn. Lack of communication is ruinous for me.
Anyways, on to the main topic of the effects of swimming and my knees' pain. If you think here I'm going to speak solely of the good results of swimming you are wrong. Vice versa, today I want to tell you about what negative effects you can get from swimming. Just so you know, for 2 months I've been suffering from intense pain in my knees, not knowing what's the reason for it, I blamed it on the weather, then on squats I do, until finally it dawned on me that the cause hides in my main type of activity. Yes, swimming. I wrecked my brain wondering how come, does sport do me bad? Well, as it turned out, yes. For these past 2 months I've been swimming 4 times a week and breastroking hard - here is what you shouldn't do. I regret I haven't learnt this info earlier because the other day every article I read stated that such a strain in your knees is very unhealthy. The kick you perform with the help of your knees during breastroke affects your ligaments which begin to hurt, and the pain continues until you give it a rest. I've been neglecting said rest, training as hard as I could. My mistake. As a result, unceasing ache while swimming, when sitting, during walking even, which only grew worse! Thankfully, the artciles opened my eyes on the problem, now I practice 4 times a week but don't breastroke, preferring freestyle. It's tough but don't expect me to quit, no f*cking way! ;)
Why have I been this silly all this while? The pro swimmers in the pool barely breastroke so I should've been smarter learning on their example. All they do is butterfly and crawl, so I better practice these styles instead of the ruinous breastroke I've taken to.
Troubled relationship
I had a dream about A., one of my ex lovers. Of all guys I miss him the most. We used to be friends for years but then after a certain something happened between us (it was mindblowing!) for a few times he kinda quit... too bad because I always saw him interested and willing. He is a nice guy, though.
If you recall TG (we still communicate) he is still interested except that I am not interested in his suggestions. I'm not in the mood for threesomes with strangers although I tend to be quite desperate in spring and would so so like to try it out. Further, I miss his tool, you know... I miss any tool, hard and potent, however cheesy it might sound to you.As for R., nothing's been said on his part about if we'd go on that trip I offered, or not. Nothing seems to work. My sms left unanswered and his promises about walks broken. I predict no call from him on Friday-Saturday. I'm not gonna be the first, tired as I am. If he does though, let it be no more than an innocent walk and tea in the kitchen. An upsetting thing happened btw us the other day - I dug an ex gf's number on his contacts' list, even though he's been saying he doesn't have ex's numbers or contact them in any way. When I asked, he said, 'This is the exception. The exception from the rule proves the rule.' Ooh la la, how we talk! Fine, if so, I came up with a revenge - I texted him I too have a certain 'exception' Iam faithful, that's the rule, but every second week I cheat, and this is the exception that proves the rule. The reply from him arrived in a flash - 'We're done.' Mwahaha!!! He doesn't text me goodnight, doesn't have time to sms me at work, but here he answered immediately, isn't this funny? lol
Our 'relationship' is not the partnership it should be, it is rather a fakelationship where each suffers. I want that trip, I want the shoes he promised to buy and at the same time I want to quit. Good guys where are you to help me out? ;(
Call me dumb but I don't want to fully give up the idea that it's all over with R., call me fool yet deep down I have a grain of belief the fresh start in Spain with him is going to bring us peace... Goddamn, who am I kidding? Deniaaaal here.
But again, read my next post where I'll explain why I want to move to another place and have R. as my hubby and become the 'perfect tumblr girl' or 'tumblr perfect' as they put it ;)
About the Author
I'd rather be thin and dorky than fat and cool
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