Day 74 - On 10:07 PM - This post has 0 comments

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Day 74 - hunger pangs almost don’t worry me except sometimes in the morning. What keeps me afloat throughout these past ‘no food’ days is articles and thinspo I print out and read after work in my room avoiding kitchen and dinner. I lie on my bed and read and read and read for 2 hours before taking a shower, drinking 2 glasses of water and going to sleep. You can replace articles with a book or whatever keeps your mind off thoughts about food. TV acts otherwise in my case so I practically stopped watching it. I know some girls practice ‘treat days’ when you can allow yourself eat more but I don’t regard it useful or necessary and prefer not to binge. You’re not a dog so don’t treat yourself to food, that’s a famous saying. My thinspo collection counts about 1000 printed pictures, 50 of which are my favs with thighs and bellies I can only dream of. Once I’m at the goal (although I doubt it will happen in the nearest future) I’ll stick these pics to my ‘Happy Notebook’ (a notebook/journal I started the other day to post random thoughts, memo’s, good memories etc) to look thru every now and then.

I know, on the one hand, it’s time to stop harsh-dieting as I’ve lost enough to feel alright and in my own skin, on the other, I’m yet very far from the figure I want and still view myself fat and not at all satisfied with the mirror reflection and there’s more to lose and the time to say ‘I’m me at last’ has not yet come. The process is slow, 1 cm is hard to drop but what I can do is only keep to the diet and workout. There cannot be any excuses or skipping swimming or good meals or food before bed - for I have to feel great when I wake up next morning, not blaming myself for having had a snack the previous evening, only thus I can see the changes and get skinnier by the day.