Day 151 - working out at the pool the way I do is not easy, if you ask. I don't go swimming just for pleasure, like other women there - I'm rather like those heavy bulky men who swim like crazy, and this must be why I usually swim closer to them than to women, to sorta compete with them, hehe But this is not the point, what I mean to say is that why on earth doesn't such insane workout work?! I squeeze out all strength and get out of the pool with legs shaking - but the scale stays unmoving, tending to add kilos. You won't believe, I weigh 49 today! 0.O And then, after a long workday I come home, have dinner, flop onto the bed and, not even realizing this, fall asleep - I'm exhausted on swimming pool days. Yeah, I'm doing it, I'm still standing strong, but often the idea of quitting visits my head. It's unbearable and I regard it useless; eating little, healthily and training hard for nothing, for the same god-damn-muzzer-fockin 49 in the morning. *hanghead* looks like it's because I strive to drop the needed weight rather than odd kilograms which melted on their own last year when I wasn't even on a diet.
I have nothing against Selena but to me, this is inappropriate, I mean this type of shape. This is what I look like now, that hateful pear-shape I so yearn to get rid of. I need to be skinny for summer. Hopefully, this year it'll come true and I won't have to repeat it again in the future. Let's do with it once and for all. Fat, go away - bones, come out! ;)
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